Oh My

This week has been crazy. After telling Tim that I was leaving last week (almost two weeks ago now), he told me he wanted to spend a memorable Valentine's Day together and booked a trip to Sonoma for the two of us. This, as you can guess, was a horrible idea. I should never have gone, but I have this problem of not putting my foot down. Two days into this vacation, I got a call from a scientific temp agency in Boston telling me the position I applied for was already taken, but they would call me if anything appropriate opened up. This did not go well with Tim. Over the course of the vacation, he smothered me, got mad at me, put his wedding ring in my hand angrily, asked for it back, and told me I was a bad person. Huh.

Two nights later, I asked him to sign a paper releasing the Jetta to be shipped to California, since he said I should have it. In case you're wondering, I made it perfectly clear the whole vacation that I was still leaving. He threatened to kill himself by jumping off our 27-story-high balcony. I called the suicide prevention hotline to see what their advice was, because clearly I don't want Tim to kill himself. They asked for the backstory and after hearing it, said he was "a real womanizer" and that I should leave without any notice. This was not exactly what I expected to hear, but it was probably what I needed to hear. I am taking their advice, and doing what I think is right for me. I feel terrible thinking about Tim coming home to an empty apartment shocked, but he really hasn't given me much of a choice, has he? I tried to be open and honest.

So, until I get on the plane next week (flight is as yet to be scheduled), I sit here and pretend everything is fine. I hate it. He wants me to apply for a bunch of jobs here. He is so needy all the time. He needs constant attention and guilt-tripped me for not having sex with him, when my stomach hurts. Stupid man. I'm dreading his constant begging calls when he realizes that I'm gone, but looking forward to not having him around. Still, I might miss him a little. That's what a new cat is for though. I'm only going to consider apartments that allow cats in my move. I do dread having to tell people that I'm currently separated though, and later down the line, that I'm divorced. Yuck. It wouldn't be very forthcoming not to tell people though, would it? What are the guidelines of how well you have to know someone before telling them? A few days? Weeks? Months? What about people you're dating? Hmm.

I looked on target.com for bedding ideas. I can't wait. I might even do something girly, like a floral print or something in pink or purple. My favorite comforter was white with two very large navy blue flowers on it. It was lovely. I hope I can paint my new room.